The Court of the Lord

the hesitation
was with me
and now I think
the choice to persist
was one not made in vain
I hope
salvation remains
a blessed reward
as the hopeless continue
to sing
without the blessings
of the lords of hosts
the music is that of lust
a connection
to the place of abandonment
we've all been there once or twice
a teaching so high
its hard to give

you thought how you felt
and how you felt
was not a mystery
without the blessings
of the host of tongues
you speak on a whim
without knowledge
of a game
we are lost to ourselves

so I dance
and listen
the conflict surrenders to me
because it was my heart

why are your eyes
still dreaming?
the question
the hesitation
an understanding
given

it could be deeper for you
but to some
deep hurts
like a cut
so to you
I offer
a flower
and a return to the game
my blessing remains
in the guidance
of my destiny

some look me in the eyes
while others are too busy
to even lie
the lie hurts
your body
that your soul is encased in

when this is over
realization
you hold up high
the idols of the past
without knowing
where you are
it's this knowledge
that brings true persistence

so say it
and repeat it
twice
the orgasm left a mark
on your brain
that you cant see
without the wine
of the spirit

I suppose
the mystery was created by
your brain
as the words poured out of the others
so close to you
right into your ears

without faith
life is hard
because your trial
is a prosecution
rather than a defense

I am in the court of the lord
the court of love
not lost
but one day
they may make a movie
about being reborn
and then you may believe

Consequence

Caring about someone
Is more than just
Being affectionate

It's setting them free
And if they'd prefer slavery
Can you be sure
They are in the honesty?

Tired of slavery
If you cling to each other
The age of quarrels
I was scared of the reaper
I admit
Because of the quarrels
Of my past
It is said
To die with your accounts in order
Is to be free
And to live nobly
We cannot leave our brothers
In our debt
Forgiven
We move on
Another vehicle
For the future

Our taste
Our grace
There's a lot more
Beauty in the world
With an open heart

It seems like you were wronged
So we repeat the cycle
Leading to our defeat
A cycle of longing
A cycle of hate

But then again
You must express yourself
Or you die
Lost in the cold
Of what was set aside
For you
By god

And when everything goes wrong
Know that you have the strength
To succumb to the virtue
Of nonviolence
A righteousness
Betrayed in every hamburger
Every chicken salad
You eat for your health
Not knowing
Your consuming
Ignorance
And hate
Gluttony
A vice
All vice is payed for
With suffering
As the ignorance
Bites your form
And your self
Wonders why

Listen to the thousand of years
Before you
Those who didn't
Became another form
Of bloodshed

Perhaps you can run
From the reaper
Into another life
Of fantasy
Where things just happen
And you aren't burdened
Or liberated
With consequence

A fantasy of childhood
Where what makes sense to you
Is fine
And that is all
You see

You see
It's a fantasy

Release

I was lost
In you mother
In maya
Looking for a way out
Nirvana saved me the trouble
Came
Karma is perfect
Just not linear in time
That's all
Nirvana is the cause
Of the universe
Maha Visnus breath
The union of the higher of Visnu with the lower nature of Visnu
without which desire
and maya are the separate aspects
(disunion)

Nirvana teaches
Can you learn?
Without the light of jyoti
We are lost
In darkness

Examing ourselves
For holes
Will not help?
May nirvana bless you
In its active form
quelling fear
the duality of the lost mind

lost and forgetful
played with by mother
in the mean time
 Shakti
the realized form
as Radha

is your release

(with blessings)

Matters

Dark like the shade
The earth doesn't
Miss the sun
I'm done
I've heard all about
Who you miss
The thread
Of disgrace
Runs through
The clothes of the weak

Serving a selfish intuition
Rather than the duty
Of the above
The heavens curse
Your distaste
As the judgement
Pierces your name
Another identity
Assumed
With emotions
Intact

I don't wonder
Because I know my fate

As the lost struggle
For a temporary
Upheavel
Of time
Perhaps something
They desire
It's worth nothing

Say it's any differently
I'll watch you fade away
Not with my eyes
Rather with the sight
Given to me
By god
Transcending
The boundaries
Of time

Once I realized
My mood was just a chemical
In my brain
The physical
While not to be dismissed
I call it worthless
As the birds migrate
Without my opinion
Make your own
And drift
 In this place
Full of wonder
And confusion

I need not the ways of the wicked
For they think they are strong
And I see weakness
In the howl
Of the wolf
And disgrace
In the attitude
Of the fight

What was the reason?
There is only one reason to do anything
Transcending this place
With gods name
In my mind

A mind I'll use to face
The passion indebted to me
By my past reactions
My intent

Seeking me to serve the temporary
That will last
For at the most
One hot lifetime

 An ignorance once had
Delivered by time
You were genuine
So it was just a matter of time

Liberation isn't
Worth anything you've heard
Once felt
It colored my world

Sure I dissolved my mind
Before
But that no longer matters
As I served nothing
And now I serve a name
I cannot define
Without the word
Eternal
Without the quality
Of bliss
Without leaving
This place

Of the rest

It seems so silly
Like a waste
Of what I knew
On myself
Words categories
Strewn along this path
The upheaval of the times
Lost indefinition
At least your tummy
Has something in it
Thinking can't stop
The march of time
Or color the gem
Of your identity
Any differently
So behold
The wealth was a blessing
From above
And I didn't even begin to bother
To care
Simple in my ignorance
Remembering that which
Suited my tastes
It's the passion
We feel
Concern for the resolution
Of your doubts
On the future
Of your heart

The upheavel of the times
Mirror
The passion
Leading your soul
But what gives your life meaning
Is it their voices in your ear?
Whose hand are you holding now?
We beget
And we begin
To understand
As the spirit shines
We fall away
Unnecessary
This body
I found you there
Satisfied
And now I shake
In the cold
Knowing how
Unnecessary
This body is

My mood is like
The surface of the water
Bubbles of pain
And pleasure
Rising through
I. Care not
Divine love
Has brought
Me
Past the depths
We have defined
Enough!
The voice declares
In the rumble of time
Enough to the lost souls
As those who have already found their way home
Heard my voice
Long ago
Enough!
An end to the decisions of the blind
The end of this comes
At the wish
Of eternity
As those in eternal rest
Remain unaffected
And the unfathomed rest
Perish
To be reborn
In a fashion
Not unlike
Reincarnation

A decision not unlike
Dieing to live
Your memory
A host to the times
Let us forget then
The perishing confusing
Dieing in distaste
Another measure
Of ourselves
That we can break
As those we hold close
Dissolve
With times reunion
With fate
Those whose actions
No longer follow the words of this place
Are secure
The ropes of materiality
No longer bind
Like the memories of others opinions
Lost to the strength
Of tolerance
Insight into yourself
And the destruction
Of the rest

I Welcome

In the sea of emotion
It only makes sense
To you

I might just be waiting
for you
     this time

In between
Absorbing the excellence
Which surrounds me

It really shows
Everything seeks completion
In its form
In its destiny

In this sea of emotions

It only made sense to you

And at the time
I made it mine
Not with my personality
My spirit
coincided

But the sea of emotion
I can sense past
Ordinarily

It colors
The world
Brings generations values
To mind

To some
The experience
Cosmic bliss
comes to us

No longer in wonder
in dismay
in the ordinary

To serve not for benefit
but rather
for the unknown
unexplained
devotion
felt in your soul
bringing transcendence
and this love

I destroy my sentimental
Self
and in this
Am no longer lost
In the sea

To devote yourself
As a soul
to the soul of god
supreme bliss

But lost
They cannot feel
but the waves of the sea

Its superficial
Temporary
I will be there
for the destruction
of this

And in the ectsacy of the destruction of the temporary
is the bliss of the eternal
know this
every moment
you think this changing
is any different than destruction?
without fear,
I see it as the same
change is just a human word
we made
while fearing the destruction
so I smile
supreme bliss
because I cannot be destroyed
and I welcome the destruction of anything that can
because that just means
its temporary

Meaning

When a man finds
What completes himself
That stirs the spirit
The choice must be made
Complete yourself
Tired Soul
What is fame
I will fade into obscurity
The march of time
Upon the shoulders of what gave my life meaning
Rests my satisfaction
A peace of mind
Happiness

Without that. Which stirs my spirit
I am lifeless
And dull
Just not ready to meet my maker
So I persist
And in this mess
Find meaning
It stirs inside me
I can't control it
I give it names
But it gives me form
From the lifeless
I am transformed
Art
The divine
I make no separation
It makes me what I am
I feel it inside us
Drawing me forward
Towards my destiny
A perfection as of yet unnamed
In the heart of those completed
Without apprehension
We find perfection
In doing exactly what we were meant to

And Calm

peace as that which creates
sustains
emotions contained
as that dawning of emotion
releases us from control
the higher spiritual love
saving us from a game

Into our eyes
we see a hue
of a following of negativity
a dimmer life
brightens
between the immortal breaks
of lost souls
upon the meeting of salvation
we meet and decide
our fate

Peace
As those who remain
guard the tragedy
And the grace
Of the master
rises us burns us away
those connections
burned away
with the flame of yoga
the authentic strain
of our mind
as we look around
and see
those things bothering us
that which no longer gives us the satisfaction
of the lost souls
stumbling over the words
to describe a place
of urgency
the nameless
calling us not by name
but by nature
and the grace of the master
burns us away

to be vindictive
a forgotten goal
of the highest
matter not to distract
spirit
not to forget
reaching for rapture
the aspirant is given answers
in hues of defeat
of negative pursuits
anyone clinging to these pursuits
cannot be saved
until letting go
so let those negative thoughts
dissolve
rendering us in part
more alive
dead to the insufficient mind
alive in spirit
and calm
peace as that which is contained
is released
and the steadiness
can no longer
be betrayed

Silence

All rise
In the presence
That the angels sing for

And our enemies inside
If we go over them
We defeat ourself

To be full of fear
And act
Is this the pursuit
Of mystery?

And as we know ourselves
The touch of others
Pleases our senses
As they are blessed
They find peace

To find peace
And remain so
Beyond the bite
Of the darkness

The peace lies beyond
The negativity
That which we speak of
And exists in our weakness
With subtle tones

Our weakness takes on such a voyage
One made for forgetting

The opportunities I take
Lie light on my shoulders
No longer being crushed

And as the angels sing
They touch those who can hear
Of the message of peace
Turning their wants
And their dreams
Into the silence of satisfaction
Could we ever understand?

Peace

The entertainment
We saw with our own eyes
They said blush
Calling a name existing only in the mind
Oh where do I draw
The lines between myself
And everything else

A question easier to answer
When your mind
Doesn't die in weakness

While some die
In the faces of the familiar
Other's choose and perhaps
Suffer in the strange

The bliss
Found in so many days
Teaches

And we still unwind
Our fate, like twine
Coming together
And separating

It's like the blood
Shed for a cause
Except without the cause
Don't say
It's called history
Cause some of us
Haven't even begun to feel the peace
I saw it in a dream
That this was real
It came upon me
And smothered my everything
Peace not as the sleeping
Hear themselves in joy
Peace as the stranger
Finds home
Peace

Sanity

Uncertainty
Spins out of control
       Don't let go

What doesn't need to be shown
Glows through our skin
 showing more than our doubt

If feeling the doubt, is the only trouble
To be felt
A success to the pity
Of a renaissance

A success to the lost time
Indecision
bites at our.... toes
JUMP

We could never jump
high enough
gravity
marks this place
with a pattern
of success,
and failure,
of anything in between

It left it's marks
On the pattern of your bones
As they remain
Past the exhalation
Of your breath

And the wind
Rustles the leaves
Calling you
To your destiny

 The power of honest expression
To bow in the presence
Of your god
A humble stroke
Defeats the glory
Of lost time

To our sense,
That some part of this is wrong
I always wanted
It seems to drift
Away
Sometimes when I need it

I see the power
And not to envy that which
Exists
Relief
Paradise is the promise
And in keeping
My side of the promise
I remain

Could your shelter?
Be any better
 The ugly truth
Was never as bad
As the easy lies
That were spelt
With my eyes
Sentences filled with myself

Never to be forgotten
Sweet sanity fills these words with meaning
As the audience
Creates the event

Never to be forgotten
As I forget my beginning
And cross the t's of my
Ending

The words I spell
Are my intention
As the meaning drifts
Through minds
Consuming themselves with the passions
Of the body
They inhabit

It colors the experience
And changes the depth
So silence
Never existed
And that which I felt
Was an ignorance

Release
In the error of my ways
Confrontation
Is better
Than the occurrence
Of doubt
The enemy which waits
Inside
To be conquered
By purity

Too solid, to be putty?

The essential qualities of life
Bring us together
Like the hand of god

In our stare
As you stare through these words
With a life like language
Or a language like life?

In our safety
The faithful comment
On the deceit
Those who hurt themselves
Have left a trail
To the abyss
If you could see sin
You could see this from space
Without our righteousness
We are the shadow of ourself
I see
Still trying to pull it together
To be the perceived one
What is it about being human
That brings the animals above to show us
How to be ourselves
In a trajectory modeled by science
And a pose trained by the television
To those who dream of a day
Where a cut wrist
Is just a faux pax
Your empty
So you fill yourself with dreams
Of the faithful
We say
Commendations to those
Who ask for forgiveness
This could be the moment,
Where you actually feel something
Some say things with their words
Coming from a knowledge based in a virtueless model
A model bringing us together
Without a Why
How could you find yourself
Without the Why
Without the force of righteousness
You thought power was in being
A Man?
If so why the calm comfort of the snow
The peril of emptiness
Or of boredom's sweet caress
You take away the part
I find nothing in nothing's place
Right where I left it
Before something began
A comparison
A birth of the spirit of indulgence
quite befitting of childhood
those who give in
have trouble finding their way out
Then the essential qualities of life
Bring us together
They cannot be separated, without death
But then another sees the light in the eyes
of death
a light we tell ourselves about
in strokes of glory
we forget
the glory like a drug
be taught by the pure
you can see it with your eyes
humbled in respect of the transcience of glory
of what is mentioned, in the history books, reminds me of a word
Should, I, Should, They
What should they do?
a view like that gives me vertigo
an occurance of guidance saved those who came before
and to submit to this guidance
in love
I will

My life like putty
in the hands
The hands of god

The Context

It's the context
That kills me
As my mind
Gives me the strength
Of slow solidarity
We can't be separated
From the moment
And how the context
Kills me
Is in the respect
Of the rush
Of life
Not to be confused
With the intoxication
Of lost souls
When I found myself truthful in
My own head
I no longer
Came to the conclusions of death
My mind an artist of it's own demise
I'd rather struggle on a full stomach
And that's why
The context kills me
I can't explain it
But that doesn't make it a mystery
In life we persist to die
And in death we persist to live
So be secured
In the faith of consistency
The faith comes with a presence
Of being safe
The context
Of all of this kills me
In my innocence
I can't take it all
I can't cry for the same reason
Knowing the divine
I wanted to capture
The essence
Perhaps
You can see it in the majesty
Of modesty
The essential qualities of life
Coming with satisfaction
How I have been bored
How I have seen my own form
How I have come to respect
The harmony
Of thoughtful modesty
It goes beyond
Like the mystery

Hero

Can you hear
If your shining?
The words floating above
The skyline
Like the promises
Of waking up
When we sleep in dreams
We dream of sleep
To the essential nature
Of life
We dream
Not used to taking
A stand
In our responsibility
In the relevance
Of our life
The relevance
Of the promises we found
So sweet
The nature of indulgence
Impinging on the future
As we pay the price
We are made worthy
Of the next guest
We have made of this place
At the end
Of our umbilical
Bliss
Was the scream of life
The pain of occurrence
And as some dwell in the scream
Others dream of the bliss
Finding it
At the end of their voices
In others ears
Seeing for a moment
The point of living

To our senses
We are a guest
So be one
Of modesty
Asking before
We submit to the vice
Of mixed assumptions
I'm sorry
It was hard
As we caved in
Earned the desire
To be free
In our cages
Of insecurity
To the mighty
Surrender
Goes the reward
Of safety
As persistence
In the turning
Of our gifts
Into the sky
Of difficulty
Brings us to a new place
Looking around
For the desire we felt
In the moment lost
To times betrayal
Our negativity.

Dilute the senses
Past our inspection
Of ourselves
Past the uncertainty
The spirit prevails
In the tears of
Open memories
A voice of tolerance
Sounding inside
Our minds
Tolerance for what we felt
As we rediscover
What we mean
Continually
Again
Only to forget
Is this forgotten
Myth
A mystery
As eyes seek what's inside
No longer stuck to the appearance
Of lust
The ripples on the water
Are as beautiful
As your smile
And some can smile
And cry
All in the same breath
While others take turns
Or perhaps
Forget
Remembering sides
To the story
Came as close
As we could
To the mystery

Selfish pain
Seeks an end
To the means
Of discovery
The senses we persist
Allowing us to suffer
And perhaps
To feel bliss
The mutual expression
Of our souls
Through the miracle
Of the defeat
Of our vehicles
Of doubt
The hero of bliss
Saving us
In our nourishment

Something Greater

You can have the whole wide world
The best part was always in your eyes
All the walls
We built for falling
It's all in order
Given way to the power
Of insecurity
Frozen
We drift away
So much easier to put it away
Facing the complications
Is a clever game
Of dependency
As I said
We built the walls
For falling
And now my hands rust
In the power
Of the dust
left behind by our feelings
For each other
And now the excellence surrounds
As the negative consequences die
Leaving us in our distinction
A puddle of our own opinions
Left still believing
How can we drift
Without knowing where we are going
Drifting like a puddle
All the negative emotions
Like a parody
Of the power
That speaks to me
Makes it difficult
For me to sleep
Im lost like the moon
In the glow of something greater

Who Persist

The jaded sun
Sees itself in our eyes
While the rest of us
Survive
Even the birds have security
In their numbers
Who answers the call of loneliness
Some don't hear the call
At all
Safety in numbers means nothing
When your lonely inside
And while the birds peck for food
And some don't answer the call
The beauty is the silence inside
Our wants deafening our ears
Still I want

We sleep in the jaded sun
Afraid of our own victory
Until the time is right
And the tears have been shed
when there's no blood
Being shed
The victory goes to those
Who persist
So let the sun be jaded
For it can see the suffering
The pain reminds me
Of the error of my ways
And that comes from a place
Of security

swollen pride dies, in shards of attachment

The gentle disgrace
Of wonder
Belittles none
As our days
Speak for themselves

Truth
Full of itself
Is all around
Ready to be traded
For personal
Glory

It's not a sad
Story
But it brings tears
To my eyes
Because
Of what it meant
To us
And some
Sacrifice
As others
Resent
The choices they made

True glory
Is not in any of us
I won't repeat the story
This wasn't given to me

Because to those who sacrifice
See what's happening around them
their reasoning
Continues
Outside the boundaries
Of what is thought about them
Of what we know so well

We can't avoid our destiny
And that doubt
Will only delay
The game
Well it feels like
That's about as delayed as
Could be
Trite
The surrounding
Fills me
As I worry
About the wonder
The gentle disgrace
Of lost inhibitions
Something we couldn't keep
Now I feel light
Because I let go
The circle of life completes
Itself
Can you see
Us hanging onto
Judgements
While our minds
Decay
Like all our creations
Suspended
As the wonders of the world
Are no longer
Worried about
Happiness
Brings it's own rewards
Stuck in the mud
Of delusions
About the game
About all of us
Welcome to
The dream
The dream survives
On seeds of wonder
Traces of regret
Oh the subtlety
Of blowing smoke
To the heavens
Popularly known
As an opinion
Held in a mind
Beset by it's options
And then it happens by itself
A path of choices
Given way
To a spectacle
Of personal glory
We found a story of our own
Separating us
By our swelled
Heads
Passing by
The faith
Of openness
To the wonder
So it doesnt become
A simple lie
A wasted life
Precious to itself
And no one else
That's the price we pay
For the swollen pride
Like a pregnancy
Of attachment
A swelling defeated only by the birth
Of satisfaction
Lighting our world
With the open
Mistakes we made
So be it
I say

Smiles

Beauty
It's what you see
When your mind
Is undistracted
By the currency
Looking at these things
Smiles
The universal currency
Of emotion
With the beauty of the world
Slipping through the cracks
Defeating the negativity
I was born crying
And you calmed me down
And now slipping through the cracks
Is the beauty of the world
I'm no longer amazed
Standing as the world moves around me
Found the beauty again
I thought I had lost it
In my intent
To be real
I conquered the envy
No longer do I linger
In a place of urgency
For all I did
As an escape
Brought about
An envy I couldn't defeat
Without the celestial current
Of spiritual love
That which no longer brings attachment
To what I have
Making me wonder at what I don't
Victory to the faithful
Courage to the lovers of the divine
Ambivalence to those intent upon the envious nature
Of judgement
Unfiltered by arrogance
Are those
Truly existing beyond the veins of troubled minds
And those troubled by life
Finding recourse in each other
Will paint their days
As those beyond the judgement
The reckoning
Are lifted beyond the throes
Of death
The vibration of negativity
Which found our souls
So imperfect
And here we are
Troubled minds
Another lesson to learn
Till perfection
Out of love
Is found
And no longer do our voices play with the negative
As we gasp for air
At our own cost
Showing every imperfection of our own
With our judgements of others
Unveiled to that mind seeing
The inner light sparkling

Kingdoms of Roads

Keep to your choices
Those are the choices you made
Made you what you became
And trying to change the past
Never happened
Like the unicorn
Maybe in another place
Separated
But we don't speak
Of the separated
The union of what we want
And what we are
I can see the beauty of the world
It dribbles down
From above
The hope that despite the warning
Of hasty beginnings
I won't try to change the past
Say this that I did was bad
I'll keep to my choices
And defend the future
From becoming
Another part of the illusion
And not turn on myself
In service of a sympathy
Fueled by dissatisfaction
Please be pleased
Make my life
The cloud that parts
The skies of man
Fit for falling
Down over yourself
To pander the illusion
Of wasted time
Because I was well intentioned
And will be judged perfectly
By my maker
My cause was just
Better to do the wrong thing
For the right reasons
Than the opposite
Doing the right thing
For the wrong reasons
Yes that's a warning
For those
Who are taken
By the aesthetics
Of violence
The cause of blood
And turn their face towards the other
Full of lust
Lust for another time
Lust for what they they thought they had become
Look for what surrounds you
Finding release
In the surrounding
Everything
Strength is taught
Strength isn't bought
With opinions
The wind moves the sky
Like power moves the tide
Of mankind
Coalescing
Collecting
In pools of cities
And kingdoms of roads
Moving again
Until the last thing
We do
And then we move
In a completely new direction
A direction I pause at
And wonder
I gave myself for a cause
Unknown
And should I die
Know that it wasn't a mistake

Letting Go

False like a ghost
A ghost whispering
Your destiny
I feel it
And I took it
For granted
The ghost whispers
But I don't hear it
Intent on my day
On what seems real to me
I say the ghost is false
The ghost of another day
Calling my name
And making me wonder
What could of been
I didn't choose my destiny
But I chose
What does it mean
To choose an ending
To something
You love
Because god told you so
Letting go
Was never meant to last forever
But when it comes back
What will you say
That it's the ghost of another day
Strength in my chest
I grow older
And my smile shines
What I chose
What am I missing
I ask myself
I don't miss you
So I don't say a thing
False I try not
And I don't know
My destiny
But what I know
Is I shouldn't give in
To the false
Urge to make this easy on myself
It would be so easy wouldn't it
And leave me empty
Another filled lost soul
With vengeance in my mind
My wits no longer form sentences
Starting to shine like my smile
Shine like an empty ocean
With a drop left
Reflecting the sun
While the shadow
Of other days
Creeps in
Bringing us back
To the times when
The ocean was full
And we were empty
Looking for a way to be
Ourselves
Now the ocean is empty
And that one last drop calls my name
And makes me wonder
While it reflects my world
That's my world
May the ghost that whispers
The mystery of your past
The mystery of your doubt
The mystery of your destiny
Be well received
I called mine false
For too long
Ignoring when I fell
Looking up to the sky
When I got up
It always fall apart
Before it comes together
Again
And if that's a mystery
Welcome back
To the ghost