Wonder Why: Familiarity

A stroke of familiarity
With heavens brush
I lose myself in the crowd
Nothing special
I saw the waste
In our souls
As our guts regurgitate
Apologies
A sweet melody
Of deceit
Trading today
For tomorrow
And as I look inside them
There exists
A stroke of familiarity
As if a painting of heaven
Spoke to me
In volumes of intuition
Similar to the inspiration
Similar
And if I look close enough
The familiarity begins again
As if I couldn't get enough
The first time around
So I let heaven
Paint the picture
With whatever brush
Is preferred
Life is a high stakes game
To some
As others are too frail
To play with anything
But our hearts
Chasing afterthe skies
Seen on sunny days
Repeating the message
As i regurgitate
The sweet melody
Received in honesty
The honesty
Not to be traded away
Even if we are in agony
For we rest in each other
Let this rest continue
Begettiing hope
And perhaps: Surrender
And embrace the dieing day
We stop and listen
To the words
And whats below
Wondering
Which is more important
You were in a special place to me
A place reserved
Out of trust
A trust that exists no more
And in my reserve
I separate my love
And find myself
In the sweet nothingness
Of mankind
What am I?
Is a phrase we ask ourselves
When the daylight
Is separated from the sunny day
Then we wonder why
The question persisting
Till we get what we wanted
Then the questions disappear
To reappear
Another day
It sounds sincere
And perhaps beautiful
To wonder why
When we deserve the world
To wonder why
When the picture is complete
For all we can see
For all we can doubt
Is just the image
Of the divine

Resilience

The joy of the world
An ambition
That can't be controlled
Still we strive

Out of style
The reticence
A fountain of disbelief
Fed with the waters
Of waste
So look to the beautiful
And offer some grace
As if you were any more lost

An apology
For the distraction
From virtue
That was my mind
Before the surrender

Based in desire
Our body impure
Enough because
Our vanity
Will never
Stop time

The pursuit
Of virtue
Clean
The wildness of our youth
As the future
Dawns on our shoulders
With a clear mind
And clean sight
We are offered
An end to our ambition
Of passion
What will be planted in it's place
A steady seed
Conquering the disbelief
Of false hope
An indication
Of being at the end of our rope
Battered by the ocean of life
Looking for the port of salvation
We wipe the sleep from our eyes
The armored ones
Armored by the words of their god
Speak volumes
Of persistence
Of the resilience
A friend of the body and mind
Inhabited
An ethology of soul
Transmutes the flesh
Into spirit
At the time of death

The Days

Life's a blessing to the blessed
And a curse to those cursed
To those in between
It's still a test
Oh the wicked air
Of vice
Disturbs that righteous mind
Still remembering it's tests
While those in steady bliss
Remain undiscerned
And undisturbed
In the grandeur of our lust
We don't stumble when we should
As the grandeur
Is not in the individual
But in the civilization as a whole
I feel the lust
But it does no duty
To me
Seek not an image of yourself
For you are the image of god
Aspiring to this
Be still my mind
Abandon all vice
Or the days
Will leave you empty

the heart of man

our hearts were made
for each other
our hearts were made
without conceit
a stain on the stainless

missing

our hearts were made
without device
which we learned
stimulated
received
the environment

missing
the other
that which we absorb
and change
no destruction

and as our actions
belie our source
our transmigratory cycle
that we are born into
disbelief
in our origins
does nothing
makes a spectacle
of the love
we find
in our wandering

don't wait
to watch
and watch
to wait
a sobering thought
the love we found
shows us our heart
leads us forward
a place in time
beyond destruction
powering the memories
of the past
upon our shoulders
rests our righteousness
and the issue
is our device
and its image
vice

how we made it through
with the weakness we took
the shortcut
it wasn't right
and the love we found
has become a memory
while to some
still in it
it intoxicates
changes

our hearts were made for each other
and to those
who seek not the image
of the divine
seek after the actual
the price we paid
becomes a memory
an issue
of the past

how we made it through
the times
mankind surrounding us

Great Spirit of Mankind

Deny yourself
And you'll want again
Burn slow
Steady mind
The great spirit
Of mankind
The passage of the soul
Through the times of man
A humble spirit
Not that of design
Of surrender of the mind
To the spirit that is
The spirit that conquers all
Restrain yourself
No denial
A mortal sin against your mortal soul
The denial will leave you wanting
While the strength to restrain
Is akin to a blessing
Bear with the aggression for some time
Pleasant soul
No recourse
But that of the divine
Like a dog on a leash
Knowing not what it's owner pulls for
The protection of the above
The restraint practiced by the mind
Noticed by those inside
There's a thin line between
The mysteries you were meant to know
In time
And the occult
Which will be the death
Of your design
So kind soul
Be humble besides your maker
Beside the exposition of your flaws
Your humility
No recourse against the divine
The divine image of mankind
Resubmit
It will clear your mind
He who takes a life
Takes his own
Listen to the great spirit of the times

Praises

A vain enjoyment
Takes me to bed again
I'm sorry
The world goes on

Oh how we praise
The sinless
With our hearts
As our minds
Dwell on ourselves
And our hands light
The world
With compassion

I can feel it coming around
Passing by
My vanity
The things I've clung to
Have become weights
And how they weigh me down

I begin to grasp
Again onto myself
Becoming as a weight
To my own soul
What a burden

I can't help but look for something
To spice this up
Cause the familiar flavor
Excites me not

A selfless sword
The word of god
The only thing
Worth clinging to
In this ocean of the seeds of man
The seeds of doubt
Growing plants of disbelief

Somehow I turned it around
Just don't ask me how
The secret is in the transmission
Faith's conquest over green shrubs
Of disbelief
Grown with the water of the discontent
Forever green
With envy

Was I put here to just consume
I ask
As I smoke a cigarette
Iv'e seen too much
To not ask why
Still amazed with the outcome
But it's for me to experience
Not to be separated from
May my heart sing the praises of heaven
And my soul revel in the absence of doubt
Cause with these eyes
I see a hangover
Taking thousands of years
Pulling us back and forth
Through time
Wondering
And wishing
For those times we held so close
Sad when we realize
They are never coming back
Happy when it comes around again
So be it as it may
I will remain
Until again I am called
In service of the divine
Hoping my praises were heard
That heaven may prevent me serving
Anything
Else

Of Our Own Device

Of our own device
I see death between
Sheltered palms
Sheltered from the storm of life
In the pleasant
Things they've found along the way

Dead of our own device
I can see
The ego
Dissassemble
In its place
Holy smoke
The fire coming from above
And all the heavens
Of the truth
Couldn't stop
The downfall
Of wasted time
It's nothing without you here
Without a soul to color the abyss
It exists not
And without the ego
Justifications
Of comfort
I feel the strength
In my chest
My heart

And now I'm falling down
We wonder when it's gonna come around
There's so much to hold an opinion about
But none of it will save your soul

One day we will see past
The passions of our own choices
You may remember why
From time to time
It's not the same
Filled with the weakness of our vice
Which is seen not
In the comfort so afraid
So afforded
By the ignorance
The darkness
These worldly things
Attract my vice

An enticement of sorts
Giving in to the spirit
Brings me relief
I can feel the love
In my chest
Makes me feel
More than just a wish

It was given to me
A way past this vice
The tragedy of lost time
A picture of our device
Is worth a million words
Well then I say
Look inside

And the great sky will open to you
Not the one above your head
The sky of the world of man
The sky I speak of
Has no clouds
No need of the silver lining
It's pure
Seen by those
Who aren't afraid
Of the world

It's all light
Duality only exists
Where there's a price
To be paid by our minds
The ups and downs

I thought I lost
My device
In the sparkle
Of the world
Back again
It never ends

I would embrace
The answer to this
And of course it comes
But I speak no more
Given into silence
In place of judgment

Throes of Passion

When ignorance like darkness overtakes us
We ignore those in the throes
Of passion
A love for something that turns you
Upside down
The throes of passion
A begging of the heart
For more
Besides the excellence that guides
Us to all that is good
The spirit of the holy god
Without him
The darkness overtakes us in our
Elegance
An elegance of the heart
Wanting more
No more to the throes of passion
For there will always be more
And then a withdrawal
When that which amazes you
No longer stops you in your tracks
Goodness then takes us
The only truth
Is that which exists
And in it's existence
We know ourselves
To be what we are
Oh heroic soul!
Guide me past this place
With the goodness of the above
Leading me less astray
Every day
The price has been paid
By our maker
The price of faith
Is the task of our suffering
To realize the fear and the love of god
Go hand in hand
The spirit gives all that is good
While the flesh beckons
Like the land of the dead
Those who were deaf to the light of life
And in the darkness
They were pushed farther away
From the children of the light
Those who God has taken
In the hands of God
We are taken
With the choice
To perish
Or to be reborn
In the majesty of our faith
The majesty which is the glory of God
Inside each of the faithful
A gift of spirit
Received to free you from the fear
Of the godless
Make no false gods
Oh heroic soul!
False gods we have made of this place
The worship of love forgets the task of faith
To fear nothing but God
And love everything through him
The sweet fragrance of salvation
Impeding the darkness
The trite which has fallen by the wayside
An ignorance lost
As the above suggests we lighten
Our load
And make no false gods
Saying this is the goodness
Here it is
It takes up your time
Without the perfection
Of your mind
Redemption
From the throes of passion
Passion will always let you down
Like the clouds raining
The particles of our mind
Upon the earth
So let go of the earthly passion
And your worship of these things mankind has designed
Nothing is good
But God
And nothing is sacred
But that which brings us closer
To the living truth
The living God

Always Time

Our bones are already buried
In our hands
As they work
To hold everything together
In this place
Of wandering
Lust

It was so terrible to watch
A collapse
Of our minds
And our actions follow
Something mysterious
It can't be denied
It's what the faithless
Believe in
Those who can't
Quiet their minds
Wandering lust
From place to place

What do you believe in
Besides the future
day
Your own subconscious existence
Faith in yourself

It was so terrible to watch
With this mind
Your mind discerns the reasons
But what about the reasons
Of the mind
That which propels us forward
To see the world
And discern ourselves
In time


I think not
And in doing so
Am aware of what is below
This continuing stream of desire
That leads nowhere fast
Which I could never respect

The desire points to a solution
For the lost mind
Drunk on emotions
Finding meaning in the temporary
And losing what it has
From time to time

It shouldn't be your dear destination
Blessed be the hopeless
Strung with strings of desire
Which make an unavoidable music
The music of lust
We've seen this movie over and over
Playing since the root of time
Which waters the tree of the eternal
It goes on forever
Have you not never needed a thing?
As if everything you did
Was in the grace of your creator
Truly you have found your bones
Where will you bury them?
In your hands?
In the actions of you wishing well
In your mind?
Thoughts of yourself taking up your time
What is new is the design
Bury your bones in Time
Bringing you forward
If your granted rest
From the necessity of life

I can feel it
So close
Time
No wondering why
Times increases my faith
Assures me of my fate
The fate of the lovers of each other
Has no need for the lost
There's always Time

Don't Wonder

Pouring down the sides
Of a cup
Called
Visceral emotion
Beneath the fire
We live for the next breath
As if living wasn't enough

Beneath the fire
Sings the air
Another song
For all of us

I took what I love
Far enough
To let it go
Had enough
Seen the shadow
Of my blessings
Upon my brow

My family
My blood
My life
It just goes to show
What your thinking of

Where could you lose
The lost become safe
With grace
Safe in their redemption
Just takes some time
To see the ending
No need to rewind

So take your time
The ending is always surreal
When you can hear the sound
Of the ambush of our minds
By the things that make us wonder
How's it going to come around

Wake up and smell
The dieing flowers
Dieing to find a way out
Disgrace
My sins are burning away
And all I can think of
Is being saved
It fills you up
Better than the cup
Of visceral emotion
I'm sorry it'll never last
Just another feeling
In your mind
You've felt them before
They go away with time

Safe in the question
What do you do with your time
Don't wonder
Don't wish
It's not quite time
That's why

catastrophe

its a catastrophe
they beg for it to end
they beg for their life
to be taken from them
they beg for their lives
anything to change their fate
it's a catastrophe

and when our fate crystallizes
will you be the one begging
when
no one can change a thing
cause you made it for yourself
lives past
spent in yourself

well here is the reaction
so cling to it
be it bad or good
another choice
a thing to do
we saw it so clearly
in our minds
and then it broke it pieces
in our hands

no one can do a thing
but surrender

thinking
one day your body
will fall apart
in little pieces
called a masterpiece
of temporary satisfaction

you cant battle
without a fight
just like you cant
dream
without a price
feel it in your heart
in your soul

no one can do a thing
but surrender

its a catastrophe
thinking
won't get you out of this one
too much blood
was spent
on emptiness
when there's a price to pay
there's profit for someone to gain
but who wins
when the price to pay
is your happiness
your life
don't act like you don't know the answer
to this one

they came
they conquered
our ancestors
born in the primordial sea
left us a pretty picture
of how it all worked out

no one ever told you
how to let go
how to survive
in unlimited time

and no one
can do a thing
but surrender

The Choice

And the days are stealing away
Our innocence
As if you wouldn't be caught dead
Pure
Free of vice
Every now and then
I can see it in their eyes
Complacency
In the sins of the time
Everyone does it
And excuse that couldn't be passed
By our minds
Full of excuses
That remind me of another time
This age old habit
Of dieing
As if being devout
Wasn't enough for them
The land of the dead
Beckons
But don't let it get
To your head
Full of life
Full of risk
You were once
And we can't give in
To the enemy of man
Without some sort
Of test
Of righteousness
Of faith
As if the devil
Would just go away
Without your savior's blood
Shed in
Another time
So far away
It comes to you
As respite
Killing another joker
Intent on materials
The land of the dead
Calls your name
But don't let it get to your
Head
Your reputation
As a victim
Couldn't fill you with this much dread
The lake of fire
Found you safe
In your victimhood
But whose choice was it
To choose life over death
And not in this instant
Your either living to die
Or dieing to live
Nothing is more important
Than your conscious choice
No more excuses
Cause I chose
I'd rather die now
And live forever
Than live now
And die forever
That's my choice
So bury me
Wherever you'd like

The Time When

The death of the day
Is the reason of the night
Taken by the senses
They pursue their lives
Like another love
That you couldn't see
Till it was too late
To change

Our design
Our dangerous
Security
We can't see the light
For the day
Cause we're too close
To our own
Hearts

The pain
Helps you see straight
Like a lost cause
Consumes
Those who follow

A special remedy
For those
Unable
To touch the beauty of the world
As if we could ever see
For the sake of our eyes
They serve the body
As we serve the higher
Why don't you save the world
From itself
Another reason
To wonder why
I am your desire

It was enough
To decide
For myself
That it was all wrong

So carry your futile
Personality
A response
To the righteous
And the wicked
When it feels like
It's all over
For all of us

Like the answer
Was temporary enough
For some subtle
Recognition

Flaws were spent
In service
For something unknown
I spent my past
Seeking the pleasant
When all I needed
Was to not be
Forsaken

A separate story
Teaching us how to run
Away
No way to see
In anything but black and white
The color of our lives

Looking back
There's no way
To see straight
Without
And end for something real
That we held so close
So don't listen to your
Arrogance

Listen and again
We will seek
The sound coming through us
It's real

An arrogance
That you couldn't get rid of
As much as you tried
The revelation
Of your soul
Saying one more time
Over and over again

We could all pursue
The happening
The persistence
That we carried forward
To another choice
Made in respite
Of what we needed

Never made another choice
That's what you hoped for
Like it could be forever
What happened
It made you what you are

All the fire
All the design
Was never enough
To put a stop
To the murder
Of our design
The thoughts
In our mind
The way we spent our time

Presently we saw
How we all made it out alive
It was like we save our life
In time for everything
To change
Once again
Like the chance we've become

Dieing is an artform
As well as what you've hoped for
People pass by
Whatever they don't know
Like the murder
Of our mind
Seeking the new
In time for the time
When you realize it all

I Pray, Shatter me

Persist
Bearing the burden
Your life wasn't made for you
Your action is required
I know why you did it
Because it felt good
Shatter me
It felt good
So I did it
But now I see
What's not to be
Shatter me
I clung to what I felt
Because it felt good
Your life wasn't made for you
I will bear everything
For my maker
And only for that
Try to persuade me
I said try
Because everything is not as it should
Your action is required
And if you fail
You will return
So shatter me
My god
I wish to be shattered
So I can receive the instruction
Do not be led
By what's in the the back of your head
The guidance is real
Shattered I see the instruction
Doubt is a disease
It used to serve my pleasure
But I've received the instruction
Seen what's important
And it shattered me
And I'm glad
Know that it's true
When you couldn't be more faithful
When your grateful
For this chance to suffer
For a cause
To know I'm real
Your keeping it
In the back of your head
But I say persist
I can feel myself cling
To the pleasant
Which is why I look up
And pray
Shatter me
To persist
And when the angel of death
Is staring you in the face
Know that you will feel the fear
Unless you live to bear your burden
And not for the pleasantries around
I feel the fear
I know it's real
Because I've lived for myself
Pitted myself
Against the all knowing
Your trial
Your tribulation
Your choice

And when the angel of death
Looks you in the eyes
Prepared to carry you effortless
Those who know they are real
Will be without fear

And I know what your thinking
That your god does not want you to suffer
You will be rewarded
With a reward beyond measure

But the only thing that can kill your fear
Bring you to paradise
Is to pass through this place
Of measure
And bounds

This place of warning
Of pleasure
And pain

It's for you to pass through
Instruction
Is enough
How will you know it's real

The instruction
Is enough

falls in cords, of necessity

It's all on the floor
My scattered thoughts
I pick them up with an emotion
Not unlike
Draining the ocean

For here we are
As if the custom
Of needing someone
Came too soon
For our wasted youth

I see the tragedy in the teeth of the lion
And beauty in the fluttering of a house fly

Doubting that they really exist
They will move from want to want
Unaware of the true self
To dance with matter
Is a pose quite unbecoming
In one as smooth as you
Not an inkling of an ego
For surrendered it has been
And now we become refined
Hark!
Can you hear the silence
Like a million jaded people
Sick on love
You can tell your human
Because your still lonely when your alone
Hurt when rejected
Sad when affected
But what is this?
The true self coming when the external world
No longer entices
As it has for ages
Seducing our souls into wanting
For which we will wander this
Landscape of emotion
It's ups and downs for a reason
It's unreasonable for you to ask me
Why
This jacket of youth
Unties
And falls in cords
Of necessity
No longer needed
The true self is bliss
May you understand
All that you breathe is bliss
Misunderstood as an object
What is an object to transcendence?

Instead of False Hope, A Time for Spirit

They supplied the fire
With some tiny fuel
A smile here and there

A wasted life
Wasted on yourself
To please an endless sympathy
Well some would hope that there is an end
When they close their eyes
And others face eternity
And sometimes with my eyes open
I can still see
Eternity

You really felt
That things would change
Further steps away from your destiny
The people change the cycles remain the same

We've been working with these hands
Forgetting everything along the way
Hoping for a physical redemption
I'm sorry my friend but you can't bring your flesh
To where your hoping to go
For flesh and blood
Cannot inherit the kingdom
Of God
And deeds of the flesh can be departed from
You were hoping for a physical redemption
Of what you see in the mirror smiling back at you
As if a glass eye could see
How could flesh look upon the beauty of the
Living God

With flesh
We've worked our lives with the flesh
Only to be taught
To walk in the flesh no more
Because the spirit calls you in
Lucky to be called
For some are still lost
Another mystery upon us
Works of faith not of flesh
Shall be preformed by the faithful
And this clean attitude is all I require
Let not the toil of your blood bring you down
And your history of flesh
The spirit was always inside
Just let it lead the way
Instead of your libido
Which I hope is fading away
Your conscience
Sure it connects but can it lead you to
The promised land
From the systematic reunion
Of the Flesh
In those below us
To the spiritual union given by above us
Can it bring you to paradise
So simply shed these things born of the flesh and walk in the spirit
The actions you perform in this life
Bring you the benefit of that body in the next

We've driven away the demons of false hopes
the lies to steal away our rapture
a rapture needing nothing but the lord
and your casket is not yet closed
your spirit reviles what you've done
these things do not mix
spirit and flesh
they are opposed
although he walked among us
do not think that you
can harbor those in sin
without first being reborn
in him

whats the point of me giving your flesh a thing
nice perhaps
for a temporary state in time
while your spirit falters
with what to do
only because you care
be called forward
do as your called
in peace
in mercy

because we walk among
explosions of ignorance
eyes full of memories
seeing only their fellows
their opportunites
and the dieing will die
and in the grace of the company you find release
our tradition

dance of the dead

A waste of time
Not unlike trying to turn
Water into wine
I turn my face towards my god
Hearing his signs
Wasn't enough for you
When I sought to be content in the guidance
Simply living a life of surrender
Not to please myself
Rather to please that above
And when well pleased
I feel the ocean of doubt
Drift away
Like oil on the surface of the water
It clogs
And burns away
With the spark of faith
I rehearse the favors given to me
Not appreciating was a waste of time
It was sugar coated
And you couldn't get yourself out of
The middle

Because of the temptation
Which was allowed to touch the beauty of your choice
A test
Forgiveness for not realizing
Sugar coated
Was an indulgence
And it sold yourself short
Of the glory
Of the power
Beg for your suffering to be taken from you
Beg for your wish to be granted to you
Prayer wasn't meant to succeed your wants

Rather to feel the presence
Perhaps what you want will be given to you
Would that not sell those who came before you
Those who struggled some without
The begging of their souls
The best you could ask for
Is to be shown the way
Not the indulgence of a material want
A weakness
One for which you will have no answer
For it was told before your birth
That the righteous will suffer
But what is suffering to those who
Know the truth
Like smoke on the surface
Curling away from itself
What is suffering
To those with joy in their hearts
A meaning I forgive myself
For seeking in another heart
Because it comes from above
And as I live to please my lord
The vanity is touching thin
And underneath I see strength


For those of faith
The answers are all around them
Finding something deeper
Than comfort
Certainly you will be comfortable
When you pass your test
And find glory
In the pleasing of your god
One for which all else was made
Simply to please
Don't make me say this twice
You weren't born here to please yourself
And as our forgetful nature
Hides our scars
In an imperfect memory
Living like an animal
Is living to please oneself
One's people
All of it temporary
So hold onto your legacy
While everything else floats away
Could have been so simple
To not hold your success
And failure
So close
Like the stars
In reality
You could never touch
And inside the moment
Was your chance
To surrender
And on your deathbed
Watch this all pass away
The dance of the dead
Was to live
And love
That way
Holding it close
For fear it would pass away
While the dance of the dead
Brings us temporary happiness
Lasting like our death
For a moment in time
The dance of the dead

the spark

the seduction
of passion
not yet over
just revealed

my goodness
how could
your travail
end without
such an attitude causing
future pain

and as the life we lead
gives us the anointment
of pleasure and pain
the judgement of persistence
given by us
brings us to another place
revolving around such a seduction
of passion
will only lead to the pain felt
when that which seduces disappoints
as it always will
in endless time

as the truth is perceived
and felt, origins no longer worried about
sense gratification had seduced your mind
and your body simply followed
your intelligence
but to the material world
your body returns
unable to do anything
but follow

what will you return to
your original state of innocence
and ignorance
in god's history
was never overlooked
by him

material weakness
exudes after your choices
like your pores were leaking
the no longer innocent
choices you made

in the face of the silence
preaching only your surrender
 to the godhead
the silence wooing those
seduced and no longer
seduced
yes we have all been seduced
and until we surrender
the seduction taints us
further choices bring us forward
a direction seeming unnecessary
to the big picture

can you feel the essence
in your heart
bringing you everywhere
but here
was a choice
voluntary some would say
as others seem trapped
we choose to believe
in our destiny

the seduction of passion
not quite over
we ask
when we should act
act when we should
believe
doubt when we should
perceive
and nothing can fill
that which simply follows
material nature
for long
as changes
continue

leaving nothing unchanged
but the spirit
which seeks
only the devotion
left untainted
in your heart

and this devotion will someday
be revealed
so speak not of your past
ignorance
I ask you not
about the simple toy
you made your life
to be
playing with the passion
between your fingers
our mercy bringing strength
for some time
some say
your tired cause your not pure
you left what was innate
for another drive
one less than that from where you came from
seek not
or seek
either way
will not your mind
collapse when the arrogance
filling false judgements
defeats the rapture
allowed to do so
by the darkness

the nights persist
as do the days
making us wise
with betrayal
and the facts
neither of which
matter

nothing can extinguish
the spark
from god
that is your soul
only cover it
with a temporary nature
a covering
as it will be seen
by other also covered
hungering for this covering
to be more wealthy
than the rest
but its just a covering

like the sun changes your skin
the agony changes
your time
and your mind
marches on

the angry times
were like a simple animal
reacting
and the spirit

doesn't follow
it creates the reason
you use
to justify
your scattering
of the material modes
passion, goodness, and ignorance
the ropes bringing you to your next choice
and while they simultaneously
carry and bind
we wonder
about the facts
representing the past

until the end of time

all the world
could start anew
and all the passion
in between us
could set us aglow
for some time...
life is a lot of things
was never meant to be
so besides the point

 the passion I held onto for so long
no longer sets me afire
and as I walk through the people
I don't know
I don't wonder what will
sometimes I have no worries
I feel saved
and then voluntarily
I enter into a contract
I choose to take on a challenge
in this material world
one for which I will be reborn again

no worries no cares
I walk faster than them
no need for intoxication of lifestyle
the lust everywhere
makes me sick
I wonder how

it just makes me sick
to my stomach
and I try
to not be pulled in
into the indulgence of our passion
no need for denial
I don't want it
this sexualized culture

sometimes its easy to care
fill me up
don't trouble my soul
I have
enough to keep me going
transcendental bliss
needs nothing else
but our creator

until the end of time
I will do my duty
indulge not in the ignorance
one day you'll feel as if you've laughed enough
until the end of time
I will serve my god

and if you feel your cautiousness
serves no one but yourself
an omen perhaps
finding something less than
the skeletons of the past

not hung up on
intoxication
love for another
becomes tiring
as the cycles persist
to weave my mood
up and down

I look for something deeper
something illuminating
it makes me walk
without the world on my shoulders
the world which continues
and in continuing some seek to persist
while I find meaning
in joy coming from infinity
I tire of my expectations
this blessing upon me
cannot be expressed
it's said you die
when your next life is prepared
so prepare not for life
rather I notice
to not seek art
or death
both will find me

find me well I hope
close to my life
I still hope

although it is all so transitory
a lesson perhaps
I don't feel like I need another mission
until the end of time
I will do my duty

Regret

The arrogance
of waiting
is waiting
without the strength required
to see this through

All the elegance
of submission
all the requirements
of Armageddon

all the necessities
of the void

We keep to ourselves
the tragedy
while those writing the story
pause to themselves
thinking not of the requirments of life
rather the deceit of dreams
pulls them in

to forever rest
at the bottom of the ocean of thought
the created


Keeping much to themselves
we ponder at the age old glory
seeing the forest for the trees
was never a fad
given in jest
to the succeeding generation
taken upon its wants
like a newborn
with everything
a new toy


The deepness
can't be faked
can't be surrendured to
whats more to know
it's in the stare given to you
to show whats beneath your appearance
as if your eyes could not see
and your ears could not hear
you were given the absolute
upon your shoulders
rests the past
the past is as common
as that which precedes you
preceding your new throne
you have crowned yourself king
it's a new day
here we are to surrender to the unknown
and upon this transitory resting bed
we rest our wants
ready for the next step
ready for the betrayel which always comes
with the new day
comes new suffering
some of it brings a memory
of the past
for that which we need no reminding
I have suffered
and in this I know
that I will not turn away
from this life
despite my weakness
and my material causes
those which begin my suffering
yet again


I am illuminated by my creator
bringing out the best in me
was never easier
than true faith
A surrender which lasts forever


Begone pain I say
this new day
is quite nice
Perhaps the transitory
can rest
upon its maker
as we share our maker
with all of the loved
all of the redeemed
quest not for that which follows material
to be alone
to be perfect in solidarity
true strength
comes to those with faith
in the unseen strength between us
and seperating us
is a vast ocean of symbiosis
all of life sharing
in the victory
and defeat
of mortality
while the nectar
is drunk
the beauty revealed
to those who can see
not for which we give
reprehension
or oaths


To not give oaths
is a virtue
to those who can see
their own ability
too humble to swear themselves over
to a cause
too humble to swear themselves over
to an end
the humility
is your best defense
from the shame
which perpetuates itself
perpetuates the suffering
it could go on forever


So take from me
that which I am given
and you miss what is given to you
take from me that which does not belong
to me
and share in the surrender
 the falseness needs a new king
perhaps the rule will be sweet
and perhaps the sun needs a new twin
seeing not that which is front of you
do not regret the limitations
given to you
perhaps the answer is in the question
in the beginning of wonder
in the truthfullness
of repression
in the illusion
of doubt
your belief is plain to see
that you believe in yourself
tell me not what you believe in
for had you no belief your tongue would not move
had you no strength your body would collapse
and had you no fear your body would never
stop

We need not that which is given to others
and that which is beginning
saved and again we venture
into the unknown
not to be known
as we are
rather to be known
as what we are becoming
and the angels speak
not to those who deceive
have not the need to deceive
and perhaps awake you will be

Forever is a long time to wait
for the end
so let it be
your creator does not want
the simplicity of self doubt
regretting itself
you were told a clever story
do not repeat
the lie
of trying out of fear
an answer will be given to you
it will keep you
but will you keep it?
regretting an indecision
regretting a spitefulness
regret too much
and your head will be lost
not in that which is in front of you
or behind
but rather no where
but your mind